Hey Breakfast Club,
I went out on a first date with a nice guy over the weekend, he asked me out, we had a great time at dinner. We laughed and got along really well, and there were no awkward moments.
At the end of the meal when the waitress brought the check, he looked at me and told me he wanted to split it, which we did. I was convinced that splitting the check meant he didn't like me, but he called me to go out again a few days later.
Honestly, him asking me to split the bill made me uncomfortable. Is this guy a cheapskate? Do people split bills on first dates these days, because of the economy? Does splitting the check mean the guy will always be frugal? I'm not sure what to do, should I go out with him again?
Thanks for your help,
Tina
7 comments:
In the initial stage of the relationship I think that whoever did the asking should do the buying. Then, as things progress, going dutch or taking turns would be acceptable but not on a first date.
However, if the 2010 equal rights philosophy applies I can't help but wonder ... if one cooks dinner for the other should they bill them for 1/2 the groceries and perhaps even their time for preparation of the meal?
I agree that a man should pay for the first date. It's not about a woman being a gold digger, it's more about a man being interested enough to show a woman he wants to 'take care of her', even in a small way. I believe that when a man shows you he is cheap and petty on a first date, that is a great indication of how things would unfold in a relationship. I don't think I would go out again if a man did this to me. Just because I believe I am worth equal pay for equal work in the workplace doesn't mean that I don't appreciate being treated like a lady.
We as women wanted to wear pants, vote, take industrial arts in Jr High, play sports, get paid equal for equal work, we also wanted help with the kids, household chores, laundry and cooking...we now have all of that and we are still complaining. REALLY, you wanted it, now you've got it. Pay for your own supper! This comment if from a woman that is tired of having other women make us all look bad.
Either he really cheap, which would lead me to quetions on how he would be in other areas, or progress "womens Liberation" has taken the heart and sole out of an old fashion repectable date.
DO NOT GO OUT WITH HIM AGAIN!! Clearly cheap, cheap, cheap. Even if you asked him out he should want to pay the bill or at least offer to. But, to ask you out then split the bill with you.....NO,NO,NO.
If he continues to have you pay half the bill at this stage of the relationship, just imagine what it will be like if you get serious with this fella? "Don't have your half of the rent this month sweetheart? I could lend you some money." In my opinion this fella sounds cheap. It is one thing if you went to the movies and he paid and you treated for popcorn but dinner should always be on the man. Tina, you should be treated like a princess. Have the gentlemen wine and dine you. lol.
He didn't mention anything about splitting until the bill came. Seems a bit fishy to me.. kinda makes you wonder if he didn't like what you ordered or something. I'm fine with splitting a bill on the first date as long as that is talked about upfront. Leaving it until an awkward moment when the bill or waitress is there is just rude.
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